DOES love and marriage go together like a horse & carriage?!

Does LOVE & MARRIAGE really go together like a HORSE & CARRIAGE???

Can you not have one without the other??? Yes. That’s just my opinion. I mean a horse can be ridden and still be as fun & enjoyable as riding behind in a carriage being pulled by the horse… Does that mean MARRIAGE is the CARRIAGE  and LOVE is the HORSE? Does the marriage pull the love forward, or is marriage like the carriage an accessory rather than a neccessity (unless used to take on more responsibilities and work as a team). Carriage like marriage, does not make a difference in the horses life, but rather is to assist the herdsman. Marriage like carriage, does not make a difference in a couples life emotionally, but rather is to assist in governmental needs such as insurance. In the past marriage was the only way for approval for couples to live together or start a family. In past times women who weren’t married that lived with boyfriends or had a child without being wed were considered women with no class and premiscuous even though  premiscuous does not correlate with relationships. So is marriage just an overly exposed word that society uses to define couples that are all supposedly in love?! Hmmm. I wonder.

As I get older my perspective on marriage continues to change and somewhat evolve. When I was little I thought that by age 21 I would have graduated from college, have a career, be living on my own and be married & have children by age 23. It didn’t work out that way, but in a sense I’m happy it didn’t.

The meaning of marriage has changed so much and although the percentage of marriage may not be accounted for in this day & age, divorce has risen. Marriage was once a beautiful ceremony for 2 people in love expressing their commitment, love & devotion to one another. Now marriage has somewhat become a joke. A game in a way. It seems like instead of trying to work things out & possibly try therapy to resolve problems that are faced in a marriage, people instead just give up & divorce as if marriage/divorce were something like a purchase from a store that can be returned or even exchanged. It’s become nothing but a piece of paper. Not all, but some. I’m not condemning divorce because some people have reasons to leave a failing marriage. One reason is women (and some men) are in physical abusive relationships. I disagree with any physical violence between opposite sexes and believe being in an abusive relationship is not only traumatic, but can get worse if the victim does not leave. Another reason for divorce is if a spouse is being cheated on. Cheaters are one of the biggest dislikes I have towards human kind. Why cheat if you could just break up and THEN go lust or fulfill your temptations? I could never stay with a cheater. Even if it were just one time like the saying goes, “once a cheater, always a cheater,” but that’s another blog in the future. Therfore, divorce can be inculpable depending on the reasons.

I sometimes wonder whether or not I would ever want to get married. I have officially been with my boyfriend for 7 years, dated for a year before that and marriage has never been an issue or concern for both of us. Back then marriage was so important to me and now its become nothing more but a word mistaken for true love (if true love does exist). I used to think true love existed & I still do think it exists in some aspects of relationships, but outside parties have somewhat changed my mind on the whole meaning.  I realize that people will always want to give their input in others’ relationships even though others’ relationships is no ones business, but the 2 people in THAT relationship. Just my opinion.

Some people belive that marriage is mandatory to be commited to one another. To be married is to be dedicated & commited always. That is not neccessarily true. Some people get married because they feel obliged to if the partner requests a ring. Some people get married because of unexpected pregnancies. Some people get married because of lust & supposed love, yet those type of marriages end up in annulments. And still, there are those few old fashion lovers that get married because they truly love one another & know that forever will they want to be with that person. The married couples that truly love eachother are far few & between in this day & age, but they do still exists.

I used to think that married couples that were truly happy & loved each other and have been married for decades didn’t exist any longer, but they do. People just don’t talk about happily married couples and for some innate reason people are more interested in hearing why people divorce or separate. It’s human nature I guess for people to want to know about what went wrong because then people have something to gossip about & analyze,whereas when a relationship continues to stay strong people don’t think anything of it because there is nothing new that can be said but the fact that it is awesome. I have a pet peeve when people speak only negative about people’s relationships, yet those spoken about seem to just fight like any normal couple. Again, ust my opinions & thoughts. In this era, there are many couples that have been together for decades, have children & yet are not married.

There are couples that seem to be happy, if not happier than married couples. There are couples like Gene Simmons & his girlfriend, Johnny Depp & Vanessa Pardis and Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie who have been together for years and have children and are still not married. In a way I admire that. Marriage is overrated & although I still believe that it is a beautiful ceremony, I don’t believe it is a neccessity. I guess love & marriage don’t go together like a horse & carriage.


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