How Do You Feel

I can’t change you You can’t change me

So can’t we agree To disagree

Cuz what’s the point Why the hate

When you do you And I’ll do the same

Cuz we’re different Yet so alike

We each individual We each have likes

So hard to think So hard to show

What people feel What people know

So there’s no point For all that worry

Cuz life moves fast So stop the hurry

To hate or pick To be so mean

When colors the same All green is green

So what I’m sayin Is lets each live life

Less negativity More room for nice


So I’ve decided to start an “About Me…kinda.” category on this blog. It’s not really about me, but in a sense it is. Things happen in life. We experience so many types of situations & circumstances that it becomes a part of our reflection in how we move forward in life. We either grow as a person or we push the heart away and become a bit more close minded. When new experiences become similar experiences as from the past… we understand how to handle the situation by reflecting on prior reactions chosen and understanding what the consequences had become of.

I come across so many different quotes and ‘sayings’ that I find many that remind me of how I feel and how I would like to be. This category will be a place for me not only to reflect on my life, but how I’ve grown as a person… or it gives me a place to put my philosophical thoughts out on this live journal of mine because bottling up too many deep thoughts can cause way too much thinking therefore making me feel like a complete stressball. Yes I said stressball… although goofball works for me as well.

I came across this saying, “You can’t change the way people feel about you so don’t try. Just live your life and be happy.” It used to bother me when I felt like certain people didn’t like me. I would think to myself, “Why don’t they like me?… What did I do wrong?!… Did I say something stupid?… Did I say something offensive?… I was trying to be friendly and nice… Did I come off stand offish?… Was I rude without even knowing it?… What’s wrong with me?… Could they tell I suffer from BDD?… I hope not.”… I would stress for days and try & dissect the action. I confer to myself the circumstances and come up with a hypothetical question in hopes of finding a philosophical answer… or more like finding an ethical answer. My saying has been and will always be, “I give people 3 chances (varying whether or not I’m shy or having a BDD moment)… I’m nice the first 3 times I encounter a person even if they’re rude or disrespectful… if they continue being unfriendly then I won’t befriend them. I won’t be mean. I won’t be blasphemous. I will just go on living my life, while they continue living theirs.” That’s just the way it is. I still feel strongly about that. It’s not that I become their enemy. I just continue being a stranger to them and that’s okay with me because they become a stranger as well. I conscientiously then decide whether or not those people are people I want to associate myself with. Energy exist & if they want to be Negative Nancy’s so be it… but I’m gonna still be a Positive Pepe (yes I just made that up ‘cuz I don’t know what the opposite of a Negative Nancy would be… if you do… please email it to me…). We may know the same people. We may work together. We may socialize at the same place. We may ironically be in the same vicinity. We may pass one another in life, but I try to stay far away from negativity to create a more positive & happy outlook on life moving forward. It won’t stop me from doing or going to the places I love because love is so much more fun than hate.

Hate is such a strong word that I rarely use. I don’t like using it at all, but if I somehow end up watching “Bad Girls Club” (unfortunately one of my guilty pleasures that I every so often may watch) the word accidentally is blurted out. When I realize it, I try hard to not think so negatively (but when you’re watching that dirty/immoral show sometimes you can’t help it). I’d rather say dislike when there are things that I may not agree with or that contradicts my beliefs. That’s just me.

Still there are emotions & thoughts we cannot just suddenly erase from our mindset. Just as there are unexpected cogitations, we can only abate it after it occurs. We can’t stop it if we don’t even know when, where or how it arises. There are people I cannot seem to pinpoint their perspectives/feelings toward me. I don’t know why the curiosity is difficult to break… or why I even care so much. For instance, I’ve known “this person” for almost a decade already. We started out as friends then our lives started to move in different paths. Although we encounter each other often, it seems things have changed. When it happened… I’m not quite sure. I wonder if it’s because “they’ve” become more successful, while I’m still trying to find myself. I create a hypothetical question: “Is it because *they’ve* become more popular… more lucrative… more socially active than I? If I was more wealthy, attractive, famous, prominent in a ‘scene’ would *they* have still been my friend?!” I then continue to endure in the reasoning. I don’t know why I try so hard to please others if they don’t want to be pleasant. I’m not one to be in competition with others (excluding Seinfeld Trivia & backyard boxing… but hey… that’s just a love for my hobbies… although I lose sometimes we can’t always be the winner and still I stay in high spirits). Really though, I’m not competitive nor do I like to make comparisons with other people. When I see anyone I know (or don’t know) reach a goal or succeed in some way… I get stoked. I’m so happy when I hear that people are doing great things in their lives because to me, it’s all love. Even if I’m still stuck at dead end jobs, still not completely independent, ending up in circles when it comes to my career and still driving a “hoopty ride” I don’t care. To see others happy is what makes me happy. Even if I’m sad, I’d rather pretend to be happy than see another person become sad with me… but that’s just me. Yet still that hypothetical question crosses my mind when whereabouts form akin happenings. Admitting a factual answer can be difficult. Who knows the honest answer??? Not I. I guess all I could do is move past all the contemplations and keep moving forward towards my goals. I will persevere in my passions and whether I “make it” or not… it doesn’t matter. All the matters is that I stay surrounded by those that agree that life is a blessing and that’s all there is to it. I’ll continue to love and keep on smiling. I love to laugh because laughing is the best medicine. I laugh & think adequately to know that real success is not about fame or fortune… it’s about finding the truth about what our lives should truly be filled with… and that is happiness, love & just living life the way it’s meant to be lived.

I love everything, especially people. I love people I know. I love people I admire. I love people that entertain me. I love people that are different. I love people that I don’t even know. I love meeting new people. I love people that I’ve met. Yet I know there are sometimes discrepancies. People I may love may not like me back… but to me that’s okay. If you don’t like me, but I like you then there’s no drama or negative energy coming from my side. It is what it is. Just like the saying, “You can’t change the way people feel about you so don’t try. Just live your life and be happy.” I’m still living my life. I’m happy… and that’s all there is to it. No anguish. No hate. No regrets… and definitely no more trying… unless its towards my goals, passions and those that I love that love/like me back.

See… these two get along… can’t we all?!

P.S. I haven’t really stressed in over a year! Woohoo!!! One goal down… 3,333,333,333 more to go! hahahaha…

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